8 Dangerous Things You Should Never Say to Yourself

Some words sound harmless. But they can damage more than your mood. 

Words possess the transformative ability to change your thoughts, perspective, and behaviour. Lau Tzu advises that we must watch our thoughts as they become words, which become actions, habits, character, and ultimately destiny. In short, words can change your brain1. Neuroplasticity is real. 

Six dangerous things to never say to yourself :

• I'm unlucky. Never label yourself with negativity. 
• Nothing will change. Don't let negativity find a home.
• I'm a failure. Failure is an event, not a person. Your story is not over. 
• I hate my life. This is a dangerous placeholder. it's a broad, absolute statement that obscures the specific, actionable issues causing distress. It can lead to inaction.
• There's no hope. Hope is as vital to the brain as oxygen. There is always hope. 
• Should, never, always. These absolute qualifiers often fuel guilt, stress, and helplessness. They encouraging rigid, negative self-judgment. 
• If only. This can limit your potential. It can paint a picture of regret and despair in your brain. 
• I can never. Try changing to, "I often can't." Small changes, over time, add up. 

The words you use shape your thinking, which in turn dictates how you feel and act. They leave a huge impact—either good or bad—so it’s super important to choose them wisely. Mindful awareness is key. You can use words to literally rewire your brain. Change starts with paying attention.

Remember, words are free. It's how you use them that may cost you. I don't know anyone whose life goes in a straight line. I do know that a few kind words you speak to yourself can change your entire day.

Speak to yourself like someone you love. Encourage yourself, motivate yourself, and uplift yourself with your words.

Thanks for reading. You are a genius!

This article was first published in Terry Small's Brain Bulletin newsletter.

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