When You Need To Give A Hug

Jun 08, 2017 2 Min Read
give a hug

When I stepped on the hotel elevator on the second floor, the only other person inside was a 20-something woman. She was crying but working hard not to. Yet she couldn’t stop.

I have been there – something hurts so badly you can’t control the emotion, even when you’re in a public place and you feel embarrassed at not being able to stop.

I paused briefly to look at her, unsure whether to ignore her and mind my own business to my 14th floor room. I noticed she’d pushed the 6th floor button so I knew we wouldn’t share this space long.

Leaders do the right thing

But ignoring someone in pain did not seem the right thing to do. I had no idea what caused such agony and had no idea if she had someone to comfort her on Floor 6. But when I see human pain like this up close, I feel compelled to respond.

I asked:

“Can I give you a hug?”


She nodded yes.

So I hugged her until we arrived on the 6th floor, without saying a word. Whatever awkwardness there was from two strangers silently hugging was dissipated by being authentic with each other in real time.

The elevator stopped at 6 and she exited. I never saw her again.

Points of reflection

Later, I wondered if I should have reached out further: “Do you have someone to talk to in your room? Or someone you can call?” Then, if she said no, would I have felt compelled to be the one she poured out her angst to? Would I then be embroiled in this stranger’s life when I had other things on my docket for the day?

I’ll never know what caused her such strong emotion. But I am glad I offered the hug.

Watch this video by the writer:

Share This

Alt
Rebecca Morgan is a bestselling author, and one of America’s sought-after adviser to many global executives. She is the architect for focused, tailored solutions designed to meet an organisation’s needs.

You May Also Like

Man working at his desk by himself

Transcending the Victim Mentality

By Manfred F. R. Kets de Vries. Constantly feeling like a victim limits oneself. Learn how to shift from a mindset of helplessness to one of accountability, and cultivate personal growth.

May 31, 2023 7 Min Read

teamwork, people management, work happiness, employee engagement

Unlocking Organizational Success with Employee Engagement and Happiness

"Approach employees as true partners, involving them in continuous dialogues and processes about how to design and alter their roles, tasks and working relationships - which means that leaders need to make it safe enough for employees to speak openly of their experiences at work." - William Kahn

Apr 20, 2023 42 Min Video

Be a Leader's Digest Reader