Not all questions express genuine curiosity.
“When I don’t want to do something, I ask my boss lots of questions. Usually he ends up giving the assignment to someone else. Or he does it himself.”
‒ Anonymous Employee
Curiosity as Resistance
Perfectly intelligent people feign ignorance as an act of subversive resistance. I’ve seen smart people play dumb because they didn’t like what they were hearing. Politically savvy leaders disguise resistance by asking detailed questions about execution. They don’t like an initiative but don’t want to declare their position. They use the thousand cuts method to kill projects.
Curiosity as Control
Leaders ask questions as a form of control.
They don’t want to overtly take control but they have opinions about the best way to do things.They want people to think for themselves – as long as people think like them.
Curiosity as Deflection
I use questions to keep people talking about themselves. I don’t want to talk about myself so I keep others talking about themselves.
Curiosity as Protection
Experienced leaders ask questions because they see dangers that novices don’t see. Questions give others the opportunity to think about the future and consider unexplored options. Some questions are designed to help others discover why their plan won’t work.
Ask Questions When You Hear Lots of Questions
- What concerns you about this project?
- What dangers do you see ahead?
- What do you need to know to move forward?
- What am I missing?
Curiosity for Clarity
People who like to get things done need a clear path forward.
They don’t like building the airplane in the air. They ask questions because they prefer planning ahead.
Curiosity for clarity feels like resistance to dreamers.
If this is you, you’d be smart to work out a better plan with the people who need greater clarity.
Dan Rockwell is a coach and speaker and is freakishly interested in leadership. He is the author of a world-renowned leadership blog, Leadership Freak. To get in touch with Dan, write to us at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Reposted with permission.
Prefer an e-mag reading experience? This article is also available in our 15th September 2018 digital issue. Access our digital issues here.