By ZARA JAYNE
“I failed again!”
When we make a mistake, this thought often pops up and we think our whole world is crumbling down, as we tend to be our worst critics. We often make bad decisions in life and as a result, mistakes are made.
Although we know there are consequences, why do we still make bad decisions?Why do we still put ourselves through such heartache of failures at times? As young as we are, making mistakes is a gift because we have a lot more room to grow.
We can always learn from our mistakes and improve ourselves to become better. However, there are some mistakes in life that we just need to avoid. Here are five mistakes that you don’t want to make in the process of learning and growing.
1 SPIT IT OUT!
I’m sure all of us have experienced bottling up our feelings inside especially when we feel hurt or angry.
We usually say statements like “I’m fine” or “It’s alright” to cover up how we really feel. Well, that’s a big mistake. Stop doing that! Share your feelings or even your ambitions in life. Don’t be afraid to dream big.
According to Tara Wagner, an organic life coach, “It – whatever ‘it’ is for you – does matter. It matters that you have a dream to start a business. It matters that you want more than what everyone else is settling for. It matters that you are upset or unsettled or craving expansion in your life.”
When someone says something nasty to you, be bold in saying that you are absolutely not fine with it. You need to make a stand and speak up about how you really feel.
Start letting it out before you really explode one day.
2 DON’T LOSE SIGHT OF WHAT MAKES YOU HAPPY
As we grow, more responsibilities are piled on us. For instance, college or university assignments and exams have become a lot tougher than our schooling days. For some of us, having a car of our own has become another major responsibility as well.
Have you ever felt like you want to go back in time to your childhood? You didn’t have to worry so much about applying for universities, maintaining good grades or getting a job in the future.
It was all about fun during our younger days. Life seemed so simple back then. Everything has become a burden now as we have become weary. We have lost that joy that makes life fun and interesting. The older we get, the busier we become. It’s time to shut yourself out from all the busyness and start living the right way.
According to Barrie Davenport, a certified life passion coach, you need to think about the things that made you happy as a child and write them down. She also encourages us to write down what makes us happy now as we have gotten older.
Once you have completed these, Davenport challenges us with this question, “How can you make space for more of those things that make you happy back into your life?”
Try and enjoy life despite the workload. Live life to the full! Do what makes you happy!
3 MAKE SPACE FOR GROWTH
According to Tara Wagner, growth requires space – actual physical space, as well as space in your schedule.
We tend to limit ourselves from really developing due to fear, too many responsibilities or perceiving certain things as just impossible.
Stop being comfortable with where you are now. This is one mistake we always make in life.
Be willing to learn new skills or knowledge like taking up an art class, reading more non-fiction books or start watching the National Geographic channel.
There is always more to discover and the new information could be useful for you one day.
We have not fully lived yet so don’t stop growing! Growth requires time and energy so make that effort to grow, and you can inspire others with what you have learnt.
4 DON’T GIVE IN TO FEAR
Fear is so powerful that we can easily succumb to it.
Davenport writes in an article, “Fear is mostly a product of our imaginations, almost always without any true basis in reality.”
We fear many things, from our future, our success, to even our past at times. Most of us even suffer from atychiphobia, which is the fear of failure.
Such fear will eventually restrict us and will soon overpower us. Start examining your fears.
Overcome them with a changed mind-set. Are your fears really too big for you? What is so scary that you become such a timid person at times?
Find your root cause and deal with that issue as soon as possible. The longer you wait, the more you drag on this fear.
Be courageous and fight your fears! Don’t let it conquer you. Only you have the power to control them.
5 THE GUILTY FEELING
We naturally feel guilty after making a mistake especially when we know it is our fault. We feel guilty when we have lied or hurt someone with what we said or did.
We know in both our hearts and minds that we should feel bad because of what we have done.
“Guilt is our psyche’s way of letting us know when we’ve acted against our integrity,” Davenport writes.
The simplest thing that you can do is just apologise sincerely for what you did. If you are not sure what you did wrong, don’t be afraid to ask. At least now you can work on it and improve yourself.
If someone uses the guilt trip, Davenport motivates us to “state your truth with confidence.”
Our guilt slowly decreases once we have properly addressed the issue. The pain will still be there but over time, it will fade away.
Move on from your mistakes. Guilt will have no hold on you if you let go and move forward.
Mistakes are a part of life and therefore are unavoidable. However, if we put our mind to it, we can overcome them and learn from them.
Stop making these mistakes and make the right decisions from now on. Decisions determine your journey in life so step out of your comfort zone and do something to make sure you are on the right track in life.
Zara Jayne is a passionate university student who encourages us to make the right decisions in life for a better future. Click here for more articles like this.